


Different

by PoemAboutCitylights



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017), Riverdale (TV 2017) RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-30
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-04-15 23:31:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14151765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PoemAboutCitylights/pseuds/PoemAboutCitylights
Summary: Toni is a walking contradiction, one that holds the potential to shatter Cheryl’s whole world, with her soft features and the strength she hides within, with Toni’s tender hands that would never hesitate to break a bone.





	Different

There had been a time when Cheryl had been able to pretend.  
Pretend that she was worth her mother’s affection, pretend that she wasn’t as pathetic as her parents never grew tired of snapping and that she would, one day, be able to build a life as fine as Jason had promised her it would be.  
There had also been a time when Cheryl had been proud of being different, of being the one golden spot that Riverdale had, the colourful flower that brightened that desolate town and made every day less pointless, each hour in the godforsaken halls of Riverdale High less futile.  
_You’re different, Cheryl,_ Jason had always said, a smile playing on his lips while he would hold her hand. It had been the most beautiful compliment she had ever received, no matter how many times these words had dropped from her brother’s lips.  
But when everything had went to hell, when she had been forced to say goodbye to the only good thing in life, to the one soul that completed hers, Cheryl found herself despising the word, hating the three syllables with everything she was able to give.  
Suddenly, it was no longer connected to the affection in her twin’s eyes, but to the coldness in her mother’s gaze or the snarl in her voice when she would spit out just how _different_ Cheryl was, how she brought shame to the family’s name and – more importantly – to her mother in person.   
And Cheryl does not want to be different any longer.  
When those thoughts, those impure and dirty thoughts, as her mother calls them, would creep up, Cheryl finds herself more often than not wide-awake at three in the morning, silently sobbing into her silky pillows and satin sheets.  
  
She has tried everything.  
Wooing Archie, going on a date with a family’s friend from Montreal and simply ignoring all the images her mind doesn’t stop to produce and yet, despite all the effort, all the pain she has faced, it does not change a thing.  
  
She might have been able to push it all back, into a corner of her mind she rarely pays a visit, but the door’s lock is old and rusty and she is not able to throw away the key.  
So when Toni walks into her life, comes rushing in at full speed, without any decency or caution, the gates that Cheryl has tried to keep close break down.  
Slowly at first, almost unnoticed, but therefore even heavier once things are set into motion, undeniably, unstoppably so when Toni takes her hand at Pop’s, eyes full of something that Cheryl cannot put a finger on, doesn’t dare so, either.  
  
And it sparks something inside of her that she cannot control, doesn’t want to, if she is being honest with herself, and it takes her a few days to figure out that it is indeed hope, despite her mother’s threats and her burning gazes, that Toni evokes in her.  
It is something she hasn’t felt in ages, hasn’t felt in what feels like a lifetime since that day when she had had to say goodbye to her other, her better half.  
Because Jason has always been just that: the part of her that somehow made everything fall into place, that was able to light up a spark in those darkest hours of the night.  
She feels helpless without him, without the one that would guide her home safely and tell her what to do about that feeling in her chest whenever Toni smiles or laughs in that typical manner of hers, cocks her head ever-so-slightly that the urge to just cup her jaw and bring their lips together drives Cheryl mad over time.  
And she simply does not know what to do, not when the only time she ever feels alive is when her hands accidently brush against Toni’s, when she finds comfort in the sound of the Serpent’s voice despite knowing that she really shouldn’t, because she’s a girl and so is Toni, one that is a south sider through and through.  
And yet, Cheryl really couldn’t care less, while all she does is worry at the very same time.  
Toni is a walking contradiction, one that holds the potential to shatter Cheryl’s whole world, with her soft features and the strength she hides within, with Toni’s tender hands that would not hesitate to break a bone.  
  
Cheryl cannot remember a time when she has ever felt as insecure as she does now, not knowing whether her heart is the only one that fastens its tone around the other, ready to clench in her chest when Toni turns around.  
  
And Cheryl is afraid, God, how scared she is when Toni catches her wrists with her fingers, trapping her between the Serpent’s body and the sink of the girl’s locker room to hold her in place.  
And her heart goes crazy again, tattoos cries of desperation against her ribs, so loud that Toni cannot possibly miss it, while the south sider tilts her head and sighs, exhaustedly.  
“We’ve got to talk, Cheryl,” she says and something inside Cheryl snaps because no way in hell she can let Toni finish her talk. She remembers too well how it had ended when she has had those thoughts of another girl the last time, can still hear her voice and those ugly words that had dropped from that too beautiful mouth.  
_Crazy._  
Weird.  
Not normal.  
Cheryl wouldn’t survive hearing that from Toni, not with how her own heart is beating in her throat, panicked, way too fast, pumping fear through her veins.  
So Cheryl goes with the familiar, plays how she always has and how her mother taught her to.  
“I’m not talking to you any longer, Serpent,” she snaps, bitter and straight-forward, noticing how Toni’s eyes widen for a second before the south side girl catches herself and glares at Cheryl.  
“We’re done,” Cheryl adds, shoving Toni aside before the other one is able to say anything.  
She ignores Toni’s calls when she heads out, biting the inside of her bottom lip until it draws blood.  
  
  
Things get worse throughout the next weeks, when she does not find the energy to stay awake at night, in order to escape those pictures that flood her mind whenever she closes her eyes.  
The images of her twin’s dead body have faded, luckily, but they are replaced by other scenarios, pictures almost equally disturbing, as they are against everything her parents have ever taught her, contradicting all the things a Blossom should stand for.  
At school, she feels Toni’s gaze almost everywhere she goes but Cheryl does not dare to meet the Serpent’s eyes because she is too afraid of what she might catch in them.  
And she can’t help wondering whether, when she cannot have Toni as a lover, she will ever have her as a friend again, carefree and unbound.  
Cheryl has never been one to take drugs and she has never understood the people that say that one drag would be enough to get them into smoking again but when he watches Toni from across the hallway, hidden in the shadows of the lockers, she understands those people and their addictions that don’t vanish, just falter over time and patience.  
  
  
“Cut the bullshit, Cheryl, we’re talking. Now.”  
The serpent’s voice catches her off guard, makes her drop all the items Cheryl is holding while he is leaning against the sink, applying her cherry lipstick.  
Involuntarily, she meets Toni’s gaze in the mirror, finds the south sider’s eyes fierce and determined, her arms crossed in front of her chest, soft strands of pink hair falling over her shoulder in waves.  
“I have no idea what you want to talk about,” Cheryl manages to say, while she knows damn well that her voice is shaky in its tone, betraying her repellent words.  
“Are you serious, Cheryl?” Toni’s expression is far from the harshness the red-haired is expecting, “you have no idea what I want to talk about?”  
Cheryl doesn’t turn around while she watches Toni in the mirror, witnesses how the Serpent steps a little closer, her hands falling down in disbelief.  
She is wearing her leathery gang jacket and once again, Cheryl wonders how anyone could look as soft and yet as menacing as Toni does, her dark eyes furious, her lips parted slightly.  
“Is that why you won’t even look at you?” Toni asks and comes closer once again, so close that Cheryl can feel her warm breath against her neck.  
Her fingers curl around the edge of the sink, knuckles turning white, while Cheryl turns around slowly, regretting the move instantly when she feels trapped between the basin and the other woman.  
  
“Don’t… just don’t run away again, okay?” Toni says, below her breath, barely more than a whisper in the empty locker room.  
And then the Serpent simply goes for it, leans in without any warning and brings their mouths together.  
Cheryl nearly jumps at the touch and Toni draws back instantly, bringing some distance between them.  
“Oh my… Sorry, I-I shouldn’t have… not without asking you…” the south side girl stutters and Cheryl almost gapes at her and the blush that spreads on her skin that is so many shades darker than Cheryl’s.  
And suddenly, she cannot stop those images any longer, cannot supress wondering how her pale hand would look in Toni’s dark one, fingers intertwined or how her lips would taste in an actual kiss.  
The next thing Cheryl knows it that she gets her answer and she realizes just a few seconds later that it is her that initiates the kiss by drawing Toni closer and sneaking a hand into her dark hair and those pink strands.  
Toni leans into the touch, instinctively and with such a passion that it nearly catches Cheryl off guard when the Serpent wraps her arms around her waist to pull her in, one hand resting against Cheryl’s shoulder blade, the other slipping into the back pocket of her jeans.  
She feels Toni’s tongue running across her bottom lip, begging for entrance and the south sider takes the chance when Cheryl sighs against the other girl’s lips, unable to do anything but follow Toni’s lead.  
All doubts are gone with Toni’s lips against hers, with her hands around her body and her warmth radiating through Cheryl with such a force that it makes her knees feel weak and her legs unreliable.  
  
Eventually, they have to break apart due to a lack of oxygen and they are both breathing heavily, leaning against the sink, gazes locked.  
“Didn’t you want to talk?” Cheryl asks, failing at trying to suppress a grin from spreading on her freshly painted lips.  
Toni’s chest is heaving heavily and she leans forward with a smirk, catching Cheryl’s bottom lip in between her sharp teeth, which sends a shiver through the cheerleader’s body.  
“We will, eventually… But for now…”  
The rest of her sentence is swallowed up by Cheryl’s lips when she smiles into the kiss.  
Hope.  
  
It is definitely hope that the other girl sparks in her.

**Author's Note:**

> Not my first Riverdale pairing but the first fem slash!  
> I hope you liked this little piece of mine and I'd love to hear your thoughts on it =)


End file.
